7:20 P.M.
Suddenly North Carolina and Indiana are playing a pre-determined meaningless part in the presidential election process? This doesn't jive with the footpolitics motif.
Today's primaries had potential. They really did. Sadly, though, the Hoosiers and the Tarheels had made a pre-determined effort to become college football bystanders years ago. Sure, the 'Heels made a great run in the late nineties under Mack Brown, even beating Auburn in this century in a bowl game. Sure, the Hoosiers made an emotional run to a winning record after the death of their coach and a post-season berth thanks to a favorable schedule in their quirky conference that allowed them to avoid the two most dominant teams. But in reality, when the ignorant voting populace sees UNC/IU, they're not thinking footpolitics.
Interestingly, both universities have unique, regional mascot names. A Hoosier is, by most accounts, agreeably defined as such:
1: an awkward, unhandy, or unskilled person; especially: an ignorant rustic.
2: hoosier [usually capitalized]: Indianan--used as a nickname.
3. hoosier (verb) slang: to loaf on or botch a job.
Apparently it is a descendant of an Olde English term meaning "people who lived in the hills".
A Tar Heel, by contrast, is supposedly a type of backhanded compliment devised through hearsay accounts of Civil War occurrences. Troops from North Carolina were either slow, or they stood fast while other units retreated, and Robert E. Lee is purported to have complimented/criticized them. Either way, it most likely refers to the state's production of tar as a by-product of cigarettes, textiles, and sand. How in the hell it got transformed into the personage of a male sheep with genetically altered horns is beyond me.
But politics, like football (and basketball) is driven by TV ratings. That's why all the major pundits who had been railing about how today's primaries (only one state has had a primary in the past six weeks) wouldn't matter and playing clips of Hillary saying she would never quit are now suddenly quiet with the news that Obama has won North Carolina. There have been no such predictions on Indiana, even though Hillary is ahead.
In the long run, tonight probably won't decide the issue. It will more than likely be the equivalent of two basketball schools playing a meaningless home-and-home football series in the nineties. Its flashy, but years later both are still struggling.
Its worth noting, however, that UNC swept the series. Hillary is counting on the rural vote.
8:15 P.M.
Obama wins the powder-blue state.
11:03 PM
Indiana still too close to call. Hillary is clinging to a 51-49% lead with Hoosier-like tenacity. (Her campaign and the people in the state will probably rejoice in the term despite the aforementioned definitions.) CNN still refuses to call the race with a scant 20,000-vote differential. We're hoping and footpoliticpraying that Gary is the last area to return results.
Inner City Pressure!
Awwww, yeahhh.
Indiana still too close to call. Hillary is clinging to a 51-49% lead with Hoosier-like tenacity. (Her campaign and the people in the state will probably rejoice in the term despite the aforementioned definitions.) CNN still refuses to call the race with a scant 20,000-vote differential. We're hoping and footpoliticpraying that Gary is the last area to return results.
Inner City Pressure!
Awwww, yeahhh.
